I’m Not Overthinking

Overthinking, for me, is like breathing. I overthink a lot, about everything. Every. Damn. Thing. Let me give you a prime example of my overthinking … I say something off the cuff in public and then realize that possibly in some way I may have accidentally without intention offended someone… possibly… maybe…but seriously, what if I did? Crap. I should apologize right away just to be sure so that I don’t come off as a bitch. Ugh, what if that’s really what everyone thinks? Rinse and repeat that thought process with just about everything that comes across my path. Don’t worry, I am rolling my eyes at myself too. 

My overthinking had reached new heights and was literally getting in the way of living. Yet, it still took a good friend saying to me “you have gotta stop apologizing so quickly and overthinking everything…relax” for me to realize just how bad it had gotten. Let me stop quickly here to say, we all need a friend like this because, she was right. At the end of each day, I was feeling like a computer with a thousand windows open that has random music playing somewhere while a you tube video of a monkey dancing runs in the background. Funny but fucking exhausting. 

Enough was enough and this weekend I forced myself to go 48 hours with out overthinking everything. Anytime I wanted to overthink something I repeated this phrase in my mind “fuck it”. Vulgar for some but that’s just how I roll. Let me tell you IT. WAS. FUCKING. AWESOME. I felt like I was just let out of jail. A jail that was telling me everything that might possibly be wrong with me from the random opinions or eyes of others; and let me just add that this jail has been telling me lies for years. 

If any of this is speaking to you, let me give you permission to say “fuck it” and stop overthinking. It’s not necessary, no one appreciates how much you do it, it inhibits you from being your marvelous self and the world puts enough crap on our shoulders as it is, so let’s stop adding more. 

Stop trying to dim your light in the off chance it might be to much for someone, let your light shine in all it’s glory because Lord knows we need all the light we can get right now. 

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